Ok....well we all settled in to our new routine. Terry was doing fine, growing and happy as could be. Time just ran away. Things just passed us by. We were so into making sure Terry had everything that he needed that before we knew it Terry was 2 months old. He had many many doctors appointments, I swear my second address was CHKD 600 childrens lane norfolk va. We spent so much time there and after a while it got to be second nature. We knew just about every one over there. We were making about 2 or 3 trips a week for the first 4 months.... Then it happened, his surgeon decided it was time for Terry to have the major surgery.... he was to have the PSARP procedure done. so after talking about it we decided to go ahead with it.. I was scared.....to say the least. I mean he was only 4 months old and he had been through so much already. Was he really ready for this? He was admitted to the hospital on December 14,2007, had to do the bowel prep..which was no fun at all! but he smiles through it all. He had surgery on the 15th, they told us it would only take about 4 hours, so we go with our son to the OR, the nurse comes to get him...I cried and didn't want to let go of him. I was so scared that something Would go wrong! typical fear! we sat in the waiting room 2 hours go by they call say he is doing fine, 4 hours go by... another call all was fine, then a huge time gap before the next call... there was a problem, Terrys intestine were rotated, therefore his surgery would take LONGER... are you kidding me! i am loosing my mind now! His surgery lasted 7hours 56 minutes. He had done fine,but the doctor said he would be very sore, he was cut from just about hip to hip and had sutures in his bottom where they "created" his new butt hole.

So here we are on our way home from CHKD with our son...finally he was coming home. Fear set in, could I do this? would he be alright? my husband had to learn colostomy care, bag changing, things to look for...ect. I feel like he was over whelmed at times but he was a trooper and didn't show it. So we got home around 9:00pm, had to pick the girls up from grandma's house, by the time we finally did get home Terry's colostomy bag had come loose. His skin looked so bad from the adhesive...duh! he was a newborn and his skin was so delicate. this was the first of our fights with colostomy bags, it went on for about a month... I couldn't take hurting him any more having to pull wafers off and glue new ones on (we were having to do this at least once a day and sometimes twice a day) I said this is not fair to him his skin was breaking down and this could be a real problem...so being the nurse I am I thought and thought until I came up with a system that would work for Terry.... and I did. I took 4 different diaper rash creams, ILEX,Vaseline, neosporin and triple paste and made my own concoction and applied it to the entire area including the ostomy it's self then covered it with a 4x4 gauze and Terrys skin healed beautifully! so from then on we never used colostomy bags again. When I took him to his surgeon for his check up... Dr. Mahaffey said he had never seen such beautiful skin on a baby and asked me what I was using. I explained it to him and he said it was a great idea as long as the ostomy stayed moist and did not change color. yes we had to buy bigger diapers and had to invest a small fortune in gauze and other supplies but he was worth all of it. and laundry...oh my god! but that was just part of it...

No one could prepair me for what I was about to see. My son was hooked up to all kinds of machines, tubes in his belly, in his arms, he had an oxyhood over his head and he was on 100% oxygen. He was so tiny...and yet the biggest baby in the neonatal intensive care unit. He was 8pounds and 4 ounces and you really wouldn't know there was something wrong by looking at him. We waited forthe doctors to come see him and talk to us! I knew Terry was born with out a butt hole otherwise known as INPERFORATE ANUS what? This was the first time I had heard of such a thing. But the doctor said it was very common in little boys, he also had RESPIRATORY DISTRESS, he had PPHT which resolved by day 7! He had a heart anomaly which we did know about before he was born but we didn't know the extent of it. One side of his heart is larger than the other. So What were they going to do about his hinney? Well on July 26 2007 Terry had his first surgery, colostomy placement. There were no complications with this surgery... thank god. And I guess it is a good thing that i am a pediatric nurse because he was going to need alot of care, and i already had knowledge of colostomy and colostomy care it really helped. So we were at that hospital every day and every day he got stronger and stronger but i did not get to hold him until he was 7 days old. My poor baby was NPO for the first 6 days, he was getting TPN and lipids... meat and potatoes in a bag...lol. When he was finally able to take something by mouth he was tube fed...breast milk and boy did he like it. I pumped all the time for him and froze it at home to bring to him. I was finally able to breast feed him when he was 8 days old...He took to it like a champ and wouldn't let go! (well can you blame him!) we spent as much time over there. our girls stayed with their grandma Becky in Hampton while terry was in the hospital..was the best thing for them. they got to see him every day. we felt that it was important for them to see him as often as we did... he was their brother! well here we are day 10 august 1st we are getting ready to take terry home. those were the longest 10 days I have ever seen. But we were ready to take him home..........welcome home Terry Mikael Bergeron!!

Well here we are in labor in delivery, me my husband, my sister,my best friend... everything going well cervadil in place and now we are playing the waiting game. Hours run on top of each other, everyone leaves except for David, and my best friend Stephanie is in her van resting. so the night wears on. Around 5:00 am i get up to go to the bathroom. felt fine, no real contractions yet. Well when I walked back to the bed, I felt something wet...What could it be I wondered. well it was my water breaking..so David went and got the nurse and Iwaited. once she confirmed what I already knew we made our call because we really wanted our two girls to be there for the birth of their brother, and we were told that the third baby could come fast. We didn't want to chance them missing the birth. We were excited and I admit I was a little scared. Time from this point on went really fast. Before I knew it it was time to deliver our son. I only pushed for 2 minutes and little TERRY MIKAEL BERGERON was born...but there was something wrong. I didn't hear him cry. I got real worried. minutes went on and still no crying, by this time I knew there was something wrong with our son. He was not breathing on his own! There was total chaos!!!!!! There were so many people in and out of the room I couldn't keep up with then all. By this point I was in total shock. NO! how could this be? Terry was fine and moving all night long... what went wrong? They let me hold him.. very briefly,let david hold him and the girls, Then the real night mare.. My new born son coded! He was now on oxygen and being wisked away to the special care nursery for test and x-rays and labs ect.. David and I were in disbeleif! As my husband stood beside me to try to consloe me the IDIOT NEONATOLIGIST asked us WHAT TYPE OF INSURANCE DO YOU HAVE? What!!! What the hell does this have to do with anything? Later we found out that it ment the difference in terry being sent to another hospital or staying at riverside. Thank god Dr. Hill ordered for him to be sent to Children's Hospital Of the Kings Daughter in Norfolk. So within an hour or 2 of him being born he was on his way. I got to see him...but not hold him before he left. I told David to go with him! I didn't want our son to be alone and at this point we didn't even know if he was going to make it! So there I was all alone in the hospital and a wreck to boot. My son was gone my arms were EMPTY! this was supposed to be a happy day! But it was so bitter sweet. Emotions all over the place from happy to scared to shocked to fear to lonley! I sat in my room wondering what was going on with terry, was he ok? did he make it? why has no one called me! Then my girls are brought up to see me and we go out side I could not stand being on the mother baby floor hearing all those babies cry knowing they were healthy and my was not here and didn't know what was going on with him! the fear of the unknown can kill you! I didn't get a call from David until 10 hours later at 8pm he told me they were still assessing terry and he had not been able to see him yet but that he was ok. Stephanie went to get David around midnight so he could be with me. So the next morning I was supposed to be discharged, the nurse practitioner came in.. the first thing out of her mouth is WHY DON'T YOU HAVE YOUR SON IN HERE WITH YOU? I said are you kidding...did you not read my chart? if you did you would know he is in Norfolk! She then said we are keeping you one more day...I said like hell I am going to be with my son! and at 830 in the morning we rolled out and headed straight to CHKD! I had to see my son.

Where to start...

I really don't know where to start. So I guess it would be best to start at the beginning... That would be July 23 2007, on this date I went in to see my OB doctor for my weekly prenatal appointment, Yes this was the beginning of what I thought was going to be a "normal" delivery. My doctor decided to admit me and induce labor using "cervidil" ok I thought. He told me i had to be at the hospital by 5:30 pm that night...It was 4:15 when I left his office. He assured me that everything was fine, but that Terry was way down in the birth canal and he wanted to go ahead and deliver him. So I left, called my husband so he could leave work and meet me at the house, I called Grandma Becky to come get our other 2 children and off we went.